December 21, 2011

  • That Bizarre Feeling

    You know, that feeling of confusion and frustration when you wake up at 2:47 in the morning feeling extremely thirsty and craving a cup of Fresca versus poisonous tap water only to realize that every place that sold Fresca is now closed except for that 24 hour liquor store that sells it for like 4 dollars for a 2 liter which as much as you want Fresca, is a fucking ridiculous price to pay and if you bought it, hours later you'd be mad at yourself that if you had waited a few hours you could have had like three 2 liters of Freca, though having that much Fresca would be pretty fucking ridiculous and excessive since the only reason you wanted Fresca in the first place is to try it because on your flight back to New York from Los Angeles the guy sitting next to you ordered it and you never knew that such a drink existed.

    Like 'What the hell is Fresca? That exists?' It looks like Squirt or something...But it has to be better than Squirt because Squirt is terrible, so now I want it.... I want to know what it feels like as it rolls down my dry tongue after I've parched myself walking through this urban Sahara....

    Ok so maybe all of the stuff I just described isn't really any type of feeling that any of you can really relate to, and maybe it doesn't even make sense. I don't know, I guess you can't really understand unless you've never tried Fresca and you just came back home at midnight piss drunk after being forced to ride standing on the subway because it was so crowded like this poor man because none of the senior citizens or pregnant women wanted to give up their seats. Courtesy is contagious my ass. Why the hell are there so many plebs riding the subway back to Queens at midnight anyway? Don't you people have like families to be with and crime to be afraid of? WTF?

    Anyway, where was I? Coming back home drunk? Yes. So you come back home drunk, you decide, 'Oh I guess I'll go read a bit of news but then you open the page and realize, wow I'm pretty drunk, and this is pretty boring. I'm going to just-' and then your back is on the floor and you can't get up and then you fall asleep and the mice nearby are like, 'Wow, well this is awkward...'

    Fast forward 1 hour and 47 minutes later, you wake up hung over, thirsty. confused and feeling like you have a bad back wondering where you are and where in god's hell your safety blanket is then it all slowly comes rushing (oxymoron?) back to you as that wave of reality hits that you're in New York by yourself and that safety blanket is long gone since your mom threw it out behind your back when you were a kid because she thought you were getting too old and too attac- 

    ..........

    I'm never going to forgive her for that.

    But anyway, great news! I just spoke with my roommate who is infamous for staying up until 5-6 AM since he doesn't have any sort of real job and he apparently just told me of a 24 hour grocery store that probably sells that which I seek, so I will be donning on my peacoat and heading out at..... Yes.... 3:07 to buy myself a brand spanking new 2 liter of Fresca, a light bulb for my room (Because it's dark in here when you don't have light, you see), and perhaps something to help with this gut-searing hangover (Does that even make sense? I hope not. I'm just throwing words out as they come to me like a true artist).

    But before I go! So the reason I was drinking so much on a Tuesday night was because my buddy, who I originally stayed with for a few days when I first moved here before his roommate kicked me out onto the streets, is leaving tomorrow morning back to California in order to go back to school in Berkeley for a year. I am now left to decide if I too want to go back to California or stay in the city since I have to leave my apartment anyway due to the skyrocketing rent prices. As much as I like living in the city, the place I am living ain't so great and I can only imagine the horrors I will encounter in the future in my new place to live. My sister's wedding is also coming up in mid January so I figure maybe that will be the perfect time to quit my job with the law firm and just buy a one-way back to SoCal then pack up all of my things into my car there and drive up to San Jose to look for an engineering job in the Silicon Valley.

    Or I could just move to Brooklyn and be a hipster, angry at life but particularly angry at my mom about throwing away my blanket.

     

    Edit:

    Ok, so I just got back, grabbed some Fresca without even reading the label, had a taste and I thought this shit tasted like some kind of diet soda, and I looked it up and it was a diet soda... And apparently it is sold all across the US and has been around since the 1960s? WTF???? Why have I not heard of this until now? Or am I just that fucking oblivious?

    Tastes pretty good actually... A lot better than diet coke which I fucking hate with every fiber of my being... So basically here is this soda that has no sugars to give me cavities, looks like Squirt, tastes better than Squirt, is very similar to...... I don't even know... I can't really describe the taste for you by comparing it to another soda... It's like some convoluted hybrid of sprite and squirt (My, I have been saying that word a lot today haven't I? Squirt, that is).... I guess you too will have to come home drunk at midnight, wake up with a massive hangover and then go out in the dead of night to buy Fresca in order to truly understand what you are missing out on. Unless you're not like me, some dude who managed to go over 20 years without trying out this apparently popular brand of soda, and you're just shaking your head right now in disbelief that I am trying out this shit for the first time in my life. 

    But man, were there a lot of people outside at 3 AM... a bunch of guys standing near bars and night clubs wearing black jackets and hoods and I was about to say to them 'Why are you all out so late? Don't you guys have families to be-' then I realized, yes. Yes they do have families to be with waiting at home which is EXACTLY why they are outside right now.

    So I suppose I can go back to bed now that my curiosity and thirst have been quenched.

Comments (6)

Comments are closed.

Post a Comment